Show boatin'

My mom wanted some pictures of Porter after the Mohawk

Do you think he likes his new haircut?

GET OFF MY BACK

So I'm getting pestered to update, and deep down I know it's really something I ought to do so now I'm doing it! Casey's sister Malerie is visiting us and it's been really great having her here, but I have a difficult time keeping up the blog when I have company to entertain me! We had tons of fun Philly stuff planned to do but Monday was rainy and cold, and Maya had oral surgery Tuesday, but we did get out and go to Americas first Zoo today. It was really great. I love the zoo, but I forgot to grab my camera on the way out the door so no pictures to share today. Sorry about the disappointment.

Amanda hates when I bury her Blogs

Sarah tagged me and Amanda in a book tag.
The rules are as follows:

• Pick up the nearest book {at least 123 pages}
• Turn to page 123
• Find the 6th sentence
• Post the 6th sentence on your blog
• Tag 5 people

So here's mine: "He cleared his throat."

HPatDH

The real stuff

So if you will kindly think back to the time I posted pictures of Porter's new obsession (Mohawks) you'll remember I had improvised a very stylish Mohawk for the kid but I guess that wasn't enough (or dad just wanted to out do me) because last night Casey did this:

What I would give to know what Bennett was thinking here (click on the pic for a larger version and a good laugh)

Here's a side view (yep it went all the way down his cute little head)

Here's a side shot

Here's Maya thinking 'How would I look with a Mohawk?'

Fetch Bennett, Good Boy!

So, in tribute to all that Bennett has acomplished in the short 5 months since he's been here, I thought I might put him in the spotlight for once to show you that he hasn't just been practicing waking up at 6:30 am for the fun of it, or blowing out his onesies one day at a time. He's actually been working on enriching uranium for the Iranians, if only that pesky ball of uranium would stay put. Maybe that's why his diapers glow at night?

Ain't it the truth (poor Bennett)

My friend Elaine e-mailed me this today (probably because she thought "Ain't it the truth" while thinking of the way I am with my three children) Elaine only has one child but hangs out with me none the less and does her best to try to pretend I'm not crazy!

BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN

1st baby:You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.

2nd baby:You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.

3rd baby:Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

_____________________________________________________
Preparing for the Birth:

1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.

2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.

3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.

______________________________________________________

The Layette:

1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.

2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.

3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they? ______________________________________________________
Worries:1st baby:

1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper,a frown--you pick up the baby

2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.

3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

______________________________________________________

Pacifier:

1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.

2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.

3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

______________________________________________________

Diapering:

1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour,whether they need it or not.

2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.

3rd baby:You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.
_______________________________________________________
Activities:

1st baby:You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing,Baby Zoo, Baby Movies and Baby Story Hour.

2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.

3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaners.
______________________________________________________

Going Out:

1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter,you call home five times.

2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.

3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

______________________________________________________

At Home:

1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.

2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.

3rd baby:You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children

_____________________________________________________

Swallowing Coins (a favorite):

1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays

2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass.

3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!

Even though it's 'Oh so true' he is still a pretty happy little guy!

Some more shots of Sheep Shearing Day

"Oh I loved petting dat sheep, un huh and they brunged that sheep up and cutting it's hair and I loved it" -Maya

"I liked that" (Pointing to the wooden painting where they put their faces in the hole) -Porter

Art Giveaway!

Mantage Custom Framing (http://matageframing.blogspot.com/) is having an art giveaway. They are located in Az. and it says you must be available for pickup, but i'm going to see if I can pay him to mail it to me WHEN I WIN!

Sheep Shearing Day

Saturday Casey and I took the kids to a near by farm called Fox Chase Farm. It's about 4 miles away so we decided to strap Bennett into the Moby, load Porter and Maya into the stroller and walk there. It was a pretty great walk, and the event was great too!

Here are the Elmer boys spinning wool (I'm pretty sure Porter has decided he's going to do this as a living, he loved it so much (yeah right but Casey really seemed to enjoy himself)!)
Maya on the other hand loved everything about the wool and the sheep and the hay and the pigs and the cows and the goats (should I continue?) We bought honey from the farm and I think I've decided I want to be a beekeeper when I grow up! Farm livin is the life for me.

Porters favorite part of the whole day was playing in the creek on the way home (yes we walked back also. I think it was about 9 miles round trip) Little Huck Finn!

By popular demand

Here is the picture of Maya sleeping in the bath tub. What a wierdo!

And here is the side by side of Porter and the guy who inspired the Mohawk.

The rest of the story:

So after we came home from playing in the creek I threw the kids into the tub to rinse the river bottom off of their bottoms, and after a while Porter came out and dried off and I started wondering where Maya was. I didn't hear anything so I went into the bathroom and (don't worry she didn't drown) she was laying real still in the tub with just a little bit of water around her. At first I though she was teasing me but nope, She had really fallen asleep in the bathtub!!!

Bennett sure loves chewing on his cute little lips and it's funny cause it makes him look like he has no lips. What a funny little guy.

When we went to New York there was a guy with a killer Mohawk walking around and for Porter it was love at first sight. He has begged me to 'spike' his hair ever since (even though Nana informed him that if he ever got his hair like that she would cut it off in his sleep). So here is our version of the Mohawk. Hope you like it, he sure did!

The first swim of the season

Thula was afraid of crocodiles. Finally her mom had to tell her "Thula there are no crocodiles in America only in Africa" (I'd say that poor girl has been to Zambia too many times)

The kids think if they get in gradually I won't notice that they keep creeping deeper and deeper

Until the next thing I know they are doggy paddling around

Then completely drenched they trudge out of the creek. At least they had fun right?

Well it was fun until they had to walk home soaking wet and cold (although Maya still says it was a good choice to get in the water).

I know you are all wondering where Bennett was during all the shenanigans he was safely afloat a million little lilly pads.

Hey Momma P, Your Fries are KILLIN' ME!

The Worst Food in America
Outback Steakhouse Aussie Cheese Fries with Ranch Dressing
2,900 calories
182 g fat
240 g carbs

It's the caloric equivalent of eating 14 Krispy Kreme doughnuts, before your dinner arrives. Even if you split this "starter" with 3 friends, you'll have downed a meal's worth of calories.
http://health.yahoo.com/experts/eatthis/139/the-20-worst-foods-in-america/

Just so that everyone understands why I posted a blog about this, you need to understand that everytime my family goes out to eat, it's usually to a little place called Outback. At the beginning of every meal, we somehow polish off 2 or 3 of these Calorie Bombs. I guess I would prefer to eat the 14 Krispy Kreme Donuts as mentioned in the article I found this stuff on. So now that I've exposed my famiy's dark little secret, what are yours?

I guess it's no irony, now that we have started a family "Biggest Loser" competition, that we are all trying to slim our LardButts.

Thanks Outback!

CHINDOGU

I'm sure most of you know of my husbands ferocious love of all things strange, little known, or quirky, well do you know what a chindogu is. "dogu is Japanese for "tool" and chin is Japanese for "weird". So just in case there are any other lovers of the absurd enjoy!

Back Scratcher's T-Shirt
* The fast and logical solution to infernal itching
The friend (or partner) who offers to scratch your back is a friend (or partner) indeed. Except it all goes horribly wrong when they just can't seem to locate the maddening itch. For those who are fed up of saying, 'left a bit... up a bit... right a bit!' comes a very special T-shirt, complete with Battleships style, itch-locater grid. The scratchee is also equipped with a hand-held miniature corresponding grid-map, for accurate communication. So when the scratcher says, 'I'm scratching F5, ' the scratchee can say, 'try G7'.

Commuter's Helmet
* For secure subway snoozing
Another Chindogu to aid the comfort and repose of weary commuters, and arguably the best. Like the Subway Sleeper's Screen (see page 143), the Commuter's Helmet sports a message to fellow travellers, reading, 'I'm having a short nap. Could you please wake me up when I reach the stop printed below. Many Thanks.' But since it depends entirely on the co-operation of fellow passengers for success, this Chindogu has also been designed to maximize their finer communal instincts and sense of goodwill. The suction pad on the back of the helmet keeps the head firmly in place, thus preventing the sleeper's head from lolling intrusively on the shoulders or laps of his or her neighbours. This courtesy will no doubt be appreciated, and the reciprocal favour of a timely awakening is more likely to be achieved.

If this small sampling isn't enough and you are dying for more try checking out the website (yes there is a website) http://www.chindogu.com/

Feel free to post any chindougu you come up with. You know we want to hear them (and any sketches you include are appreciated)!

Monkey see, Monkey do

Yesterday the kids were watching the movie Spirit (the horse movie) and one of the horses has a circle painted around it's eye. I was siting here checking blogs and suddenly Porter comes out of the bathroom looking like this...

Yup, that's toothpaste alright.

Tradition......Tradition! (imagine Fiddler)

So listening to Sis. Cheryl Lant yesterday talking about tradition, I decided that I wanted to have some fun traditions that the kids could look forward to on General Conference weekend as it can be long and our kids attention spans can be incredibly short. So for Saturday afternoon session we made "Conference Cookies" which actually turned out to be utterly disgusting and inedible to my sensitive pallete, but needless to say, the kids liked them and we did have a fun time making them together. I did learn that making "Conference Cookies" totally kills any chance you have of actually paying attention to the speakers going on in the background as the decibels in the kitchen far outnumber by double the decibels in the livingroom.
So with that flop under my belt, I decided to try again, this time with waffles. Since I had to wake up early with Bennett anyway, (6am is no time to be waking up on a weekend), I started whipping up some waffle mix which immedeatley woke the kids up from their deep reverie and after changing some PeePee clothes, we started making "Crazy Conference Cakes". I know, but for some reason it's more fun when the names all start with the same letter, you try it at home, it's fun. We whipped up the waffle batter and then started mixing in food coloring to the likes that even Jackson Pollock would have been proud. The result, a plethora of waffles that were fun to make, and even more fun to eat, though, next time, I promised myself I would use an Alton Brown recipie.
Hopefully this pattern will establish some kind of nostalgia in my children each Conference weekend, or at least maybe it'll instill such nausia that they'll want to pay attention just to keep me out of the kitchen.

Maya wanted to be strapped like baby Bennett, unfortunately, she had to cling on for dear life.

We Finally found a recipie that we wanted to try

And as always, the dough was the best part.

Next on to Crazy Conference Cakes.

I personally think Amanda looks a little apprehensive about weating purple waffles.

Popular

This was a show stealer, it had Amanda and I rolling!

Gotta love Kristen Chenoweth.

Biggest Loser

So Casey and I have instigated a family Biggest Loser competition (don't worry Leigh, I promise we do not tolerate blubbering.) For more details check out my (hilarious) mom's blog http://www.kathyporter5.blogspot.com/. I was feeling very confident but I think I talked too much smack and the fellow contestants are really "bringing the game" (as my dad likes to say).

Aftermath

Since I took quite the blogger break I figure I should concentrate on getting back into the swing of things. But sometimes concentrating real hard on something can make it almost impossissible to do. I'm concentrating so hard I can't think of anything to blog about so here are a few pics of my cute boys.